May 2011
1 post
Poverty
Sometimes i wonder if being impoverished unleashes a potential that is much harder to attain than a person who is pampered their entire life, not really knowing much about the real world. Being in a bubble, attached to their computer screens, rarely allowing the sun’s rays to touch them, i feel like we are stuck. The computer, the internet, is built to keep us using it. It is built to make...
April 2011
1 post
Me.
I have a feeling that this post will be long and personal so it is mostly written for myself but if you wanna read go ahead..
For the majority of my life, i have always lived and gotten my way. Very rarely will i step down and accept what i do not want. But yet, i am also a coward. When confronted with issues and problems, i fear confrontation and direct conflict, so instead of facing the...
March 2011
3 posts
What's it worth?
Living in America, the culture teaches us to continually search for a gratification that comes instantly. We, as American, embrace this to its fullest, as life is easier when work is paid off with instant results. I have joined many of the other Asians in hustling the ipad 2, which is a business that feeds of the American need for instant gratification. When the ipad first came out, people paid...
yay!
done with finals. no more crutching around @ ucsc. woohooo!!!
Fremont, HERE I COME!!!
so...
bein on crutches when you are sore and already have no arm strength sucks.
boo for being weaksauce.
February 2011
7 posts
2 tags
What is love?
What is love? Is it being loyal, completely committed to somebody, willing to die for them? Is it merely a matter of somebody’s commitment to one another? Or is it something different, something deeper. Jesus died for our sins, and “loved” us no matter who we were, unconditional love. Agape love. What is agape love? Is it stupidity? 1 Corinthians 13 tells us that love is...
acts 3
It begins when Peter and John are going to the temple, and see a beggar. The demand his attention and then peter says, Silver and gold i do not have, but what i have i give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.” Then, the man proceeds to walk. People come in awe, seeing the once lame beggar walking. In awe, they turn to Peter and John, acting as if they are Gods. Peter quickly...
acts 2
The first section of this chapter consists of the holy spirit coming down upon the believers causing them to speak in their native languages but yet everybody can understand them, even those who dont understand their language. It is interesting that the bible says that some made fun of them and said that they had too much wine. It can be paralleled to today, often times people will casually say...
a chapter a day
i’m picking up my bible again, and i have decided to read a chapter a day starting with acts. i will be posting alot so if you dont want to be flooded by my posts then i would unfollow…
acts 1
It begins with the apostles being very confused with what to do. Their teacher, Jesus, left them, and they were lost. This confusion is exactly what we do when we feel a dry spell where we...
Time
After recently quitting LoL (a video game) and all other video games for that matter, i have found that i have lots of time on my hands. I knew how much time i spent playing, but i didnt exactly know how much i could do with it. It is funny how time works, sometimes we are fighting to get more of it, and others we are watching the clock tick painfully slow as we dread the hours to come. I find...
uhh
im going to start posting my writing on tumblr…
they may annoy you so you should unfollow me :]
3 tags
its really long. dont read it.
American Pacifism
I am writing this not because I want to or think it is interesting. I am writing this because it is what I see. What I see makes me depressed, sad to the very center of myself. I am watching my fellow young adults and the children of this country grow up loving nothing. I am finding that the American life is nothing more than a set of rituals that stresses efficiency...
November 2010
2 posts
Finally done
I havent posted on tumblr in a LONG TIME. However, i have an incredibly good reason… I have been studying. If you know me, that is amazing because I never studied in Highschool… Like… ever… Now, i didnt just study a little, bit, i studied atleast 7 hours on ONE subject for ONE midterm. It is crazy. Anyways, i feel like i actually know econ and i think i did fairly...
drummers
For some strange reason, i tend to love watching certain drummers. I love to watch drummers in worship that dont just drum for the music, but drum for God. I am talking about the drummers that, although they are in the back, not only sing, but almost dance as they play the drums. I first fell in love with watching these drummers worship when i was at Yugo and i saw the first drummer that i felt...
October 2010
9 posts
Ignorance
I went to an intervarsity bible study, and i noticed a lot of ignorance. There was a reference to predestination, and I jumped on it asap because i like hotly debated topics. The exact verse is John 6:65, And he said, “For this reason i have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father.” At face value, predestination appears to be the answer. I began to...
Perfection
In philosophy, we are learning about Descartes thinking. He says, imperfections is the absence of something. For example, the imperfection of violence is the absence of peace and whatnot. Furthermore, it takes perfection to make imperfection, a whole to make a partial whole. We, are imperfect. Thus, if we are imperfect, there must be something perfect that made us. I found this very...
@ chris
Chris
interesting. i actually never thought of judgment in of itself as being a necessity for the greater good because of how skewed its definition is. what im confused about is the difference in your point between rebuking and judgment..?
I would say that in order to rebuke, we must judge first. Why would you rebuke somebody if, from what you judged, is okay? In other words, one must...
Judgment
Matthew 7:1-5
1“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
3“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’...
Home
Home is where the heart is. Whether it be in the heavens or on earth, wherever the heart is, we will always find home. This is where the beginning of my problem with the body of Christ begins. First, the implications of home is comfort and relaxation. While these are not bad things, when put into perspective they can be bad. I personally translate those words into lukewarm. Why? As...
Embracing vs. obeying
We are all constantly faced with trials and tribulations, but what makes us or breaks us is how we choose to deal with them. Whether it be a lifelong addiction to a particular sin or sin or simply the beginning of an addiction to sin, we are faced with three choices. By addiction, i mean more than just a “screw up,” but a consistent behavior with no signs of genuine resistance or...
living or dying
What are you doing with your life? Are you moving forward or are you just trying to slide by life, to wait until life gets better or easier for you. I dont think there is ever a time when life gets better or easier, it is all about perspective. Some people say, “well, life has been really tough for me.” I do not doubt that fact, but at every problem, we are at a crossroads. We can...
4 tags
New Idea
I have decided to begin writing 2-3 times a week, about what i think about.
I want to begin by talking about a problem i had with a message that i recently heard at an aacf meeting at ucsc. It is not a problem that i had in particular with the speaker, it was more of a problem with a phrase that speakers often use. It is the phrase, “God is first.” While at a first glance, it seems...
i dont know if this makes sense...
Life. What is it really all about. I am sitting in my room with Kyle and Laura, one of the few couples that are actually wholesome. Tonight is my first true Friday night, it is when all the beer and pot really comes out. The people who you think you know suddenly change from meek to loose, from calm to crazy. I find it incredibly sad that people drink. The obvious reason why people drink is...
April 2010
1 post
I wonder when the last time i tumblr'd was...
Anyways… I had this thought and i felt like i should share it with people instead of keeping it to myself as usual. :P
God has faith in us. A while back, i was talking with my step mom. Her upcoming sermon was about faith. for some reason i do really good thinking in the shower, and while showering, i thought about faith. I came up with the faith that we want to strive for. It is...
October 2009
1 post
Sometimes I wonder what will happen with everything. Sometimes I wonder why things have happened already. And sometimes i wonder which of the things i will stay consistant in and which of them i wont. I take a look back at my past and i see, oh, i see now what went wrong there. I try to take that same look at the present, but i cannot. i have no way of knowing what is going to happen to me.
...
August 2009
2 posts
did you know you’re going to die?
Did you know that you dont know when your going to die?
Are you doing the things you want to be doing with your life and saying the things you want to say to the people you love?
You never know when your last day is.
From Tuesday’s with Morrie
“A wrestling match.” He laughs. “Yes, you could describe life that way.”
“So with side wins?”
“Which side wins?”
He smiles at me, the crinkled eyes, the crooked teeth.
“Love wins. Love always wins.”
i havent posted in a long time on tumblr. i never really felt the need to post a blog. not that...
July 2009
9 posts
my dog
is getting old.
and blind.
and has athritis.
i dont want my doggy to die. ;(
being stuck...
on the road going to the grapevine (in soca) and getting delayed for like two hours in the hot sun with no AC because the car might over heat sucks…
alot.
It’s okay, i read the bible so it was all good..
i guess.
I wonder why offerings in the bible need to be repeated so many times… It seems so pointless…
Anyways, yugo was fun… except now people are sick. :[.
...
I'm back!!!
I’m back from mexico and I just finished scanning all of the posts that people made. I can’t wait to get home now that I’m in irvine.
disturbed...
i was recently disturbed…
sort of…
i noticed…
that a lot of people follow the band wagon. (duh)
not only is there the micheal jackson craze where suddenly micheal jackson has a ton of new fans… like… tons of people who never listened to him before are suddenly listening to him now…
And.. im not really sure why. He was always good… And suddenly he...
O.o
wee…
i have no idea what i am doing right now with my life but i am okay with it.
In fact…
i am very very okay with it.
Or even…
happy with it.
btw, if you havent read the shack, i really think you should. it is a really good book. :D
(even though some concept may be questionable… overall, it is a good book.)
borisjohnson:
Jesus Christ Walks - KanYe West...
recently...
i have been wondering who i am, where i am going, and what i should be doing.
Still, i wonder these things.
But now, i realize that i dont need to know the things. I guess a large part of the beauty of life and God is the unknown. I think its time to stop worrying about the future, and the past, and its time to start living the present.
doubt
shrouds my mind.
I dont know who i am, what i am doing, or where i am going.
Wanna burn?
My life is going crazy. Things are happening and all i know is that i am going to keep trying. It isnt really bad, but it is just really confusing. In my confusion this morning, i went to the park. At the park, i read exodus. I read how God was going to abandon his people because he was scared he was going to destroy them because they were “stiff-necked.” Moses then convinces him...
June 2009
15 posts
To risk or not to risk...
i used to think risking being friends with people wasnt worth it. I used to think that the pain following the end of any relationship was not worth the joy and fun of the time during the relationship. I found out that this thinking doesnt really make any sense at all, but yet it makes ton sof sense to me in a way.
So i wonder once again, if it is worth it. I want to say yes it is, but then i...
Time...
I always wondered when it is time to let go and when it is time to hold on.
When it is time to find out what in the world i want to do.
Relay for life was fun, just wandering around with Mindy looking for a darker place to sleep/rest because the field was so bright and loud. :P. We never really found that place because in the court yard, annoying people with flashlights were playing sharks and...
GRAWR!
It is really funny how good days can become bad days so quickly…
and visa versa. -_-
Today, i basically went to stacey’s party, and then to church. Stacey’s party was fun despite the lame water park. Hanging out with my friends and stuff was just a blast :D. One of the funniest parts was when i was going down the dark slide with kevin and i tickled him like crazy. It was...
Yosemite
yosemite was a good trip for me. However, most of the people that i went with thought i wasnt having fun. And honestly, i didnt really have fun thrilling adventure, but i found a different kind of fun… i guess.
To be honest, i was incredibly antisocial, doing the minimal activity required by my parents. I tried to skip out on as much as possible, and i didnt participate in too much...
yay....
today was a pretty good day. i got new earbuds, i got unexpected money from my grandpa that paid for these earbuds and more.
And, not only do these earbuds have good sound, but they block out noise that i dont want to hear…
i.e. my parents. my bro talking to his gf. random annoying people… pretty much all noise becomes background noise and it makes it easier for me to focus :D.
...
Today
i watched up :D.
it was sort of awkward because i went to see it with mindy and her family…
I would say hi to fred, but he is suppose to be gone… (you probably wont get that)
I thought that up was pretty cute. I got sad (but didnt cry) when the wifey died… Other than that, i didnt really get that sad throughout the movie. I personally thought that some parts of the movie...
Life goes on...
people move on.
things die.
things are born.
But everything is according to God’s plan.
If you let him.
I think it is time for me to let go.
To let go of some things.
To grab on to others.
To start some new things.
To end others.
To do new things.
To stop others.
To make new friends.
To distance from others.
To live life.
To move on.
Life goes on.
Will i go on with it?
...
Irony...
Today, at the youth alive bbq thing, i realized something about myself. i realized just how fitting my name is for me. Thomas in the bible is partially known for doubting Jesus was resurected until seeing him, and I tend to doubt people until i see a physical change in them either through a decision they made, or an action they took.
And, like thomas, i was proven wrong three times now.
Not...
6/17/09
the day i started reading the bible with the idea to read it cover to cover…
i just want to see how long it takes me and if i actually do it. :D
Good/bad day
Overall, today was good, in basically all aspects except one.
Today was my last day of spanish forever.
Today was my last day of hardish/important finals.
Today was the last day i walked with my mei mei to science.
Today was the last day i cared even a little bit about school. (i’m assuming as a senior i wont care :P)
So, overall, today was a good day. I wasnt so emo either :D.
...
i miss...
i miss being in elementary school. i miss having different best friends almost every year. i miss being able to make friends so easily. i miss simplicity. i miss stupid games we used to play like tag and “girls have cooties.” i miss getting referrals for forging my dad’s signature by signing Dad. I miss being a small little boy. i miss being able to listen to everything...
for the past two nights, i have had two different dreams, with the same feeling.
my first dream, i remember that one of my friends left. And, i was left with a feeling of emptyness.
My second dream, i remember that i had forgotten my wallet and keys and cell phone. And, i was once again left with a feeling of emptyness.
Sometimes i wonder if dreams are affected by mood. Recently, i think that...
Heart break
Is only there to make me stronger.
i wish…
i wish everything went my way that God will do what is right.
I ask God why he gives me pain thank God for pain because i know it is for the best and it will only make me stronger.
I cannot help myself but to cry.
I cry because i am sad.
But yet, i cant even tell my friends why i am crying, because their time will come as well.
I think it is...
Interesting enough...
The lord will provide. The lord will give you what you need, not what you think you need or want.
today was pretty interesting for me. I was once again slapped in the face by God. I was simply told that my doubts honestly arent very strong.
I dont see that much.
In fact, i see very little.
Very.
Very.
Little.
Its funny, how once i thought i saw just about everything.
And a few weeks...